Once upon a time, a princess was locked in a tower...
'Hang on,' said the princess. 'What am I doing here?'
'Um', said the narrator, 'some witch put you there, remember?
'But why?' asked the princess.
'So a prince can rescue you', replied the narrator.
'Well, I'm pretty sure it's easy to escape from here. Look, there's some conveniently-placed foot-holes in the brickwork.'
'You aren't meant to notice that. That's for the prince.'
'Well...can't I just climb down now and save him the bother?'
'...No. The prince will come, and after he rescues you, you can marry him!'
'What if I don't like him?'
'Of course you will. You'll be eternally in love with him!'
'Can I change my mind?'
'No! You're only meant to have one love your whole life, duh.'
'What about Prince Charming? Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White...he sure gets around. No one calls him a slut. Why is that? And why do you assume I want a prince? Maybe I prefer princesses instead, think of that?'
'Bloody hell,' said the narrator. 'Can you just shut up and be rescued?'
'No,' said the princess. 'I don't think I will.' And she climbed out of the tower.
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